How To Save Your Marriage

When your spouse seems minutes away from packing their bags - or you're living separately by now - convincing a spouse to save a marriage can seem extremely difficult. If you take a step back from the situation, though, you can find that there are realistic options for changing the mind of a spouse who's planning to walk out. Here are some techniques that may just get your spouse to come around.

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Fake it 'til you make it!

It's a normal strategy for business and other areas of social like, but acting "as if" works for marriages, too. It works so well because how we act has a major influence both on how we feel and on how others see us. For a while, try forgetting that you have anything but a wonderfully blissful marriage and treat your partner accordingly. Now, that's not really so easy if your partner's still bitter and liable to pick a fight. Still, you can take advantage of those times when things are going well to try to see your spouse as someone you were deeply in love with when you have decided to get married.

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Be reasonable!

Whether you want your spouse to join you in marriage counseling or maybe try out a few tips you picked up from a book, you'll have more success in winning them over if you don't push. Threats, guilt trips, and begging are more likely to push your partner aside than give you any success convincing a mate to save a marriage. Instead, use a calm logical way that taps into the underlying regard you spouse most likely still has for you or at least for the children. Statements like "With everything we've invested together, don't you think it's worth a try to save it?" or "Wouldn't you instead be able to tell the kids we tried it all?" can help.

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Address the problems!

When convincing a spouse to save a marriage, promises to change ring somewhat hollow unless you can back them up. If you expect your spouse to believe you're not going to repeat some mistakes in the future, give them a real reason. This is especially vital if you've had an affair or you're struggling with an addiction. For example, if you've started counseling to resolve an addiction that you've never dealt with before, your partner has a reason to believe things will get better.

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Take care of yourself!

The stress and low mood marital problems naturally bring about can leave you feeling like you just don't want to do something. For your own sake, though, don't surrender to that feeling or you'll only make yourself feel worse and push your spouse farther away. Make sure you're eating right, getting enough sleep, and not cutting corners on personal grooming. Stay on top of your responsibilities like finances and home maintenance.

If you are in need of marriage advice, chances are that you have begun to encounter troubles in your marriage. There are going to be fluctuations in any relationship.

Convincing a mate to save a marriage isn't always easy, but it can be done. The most essential thing you need to do is stay calm, stay upbeat, and actively find solutions to the problems between you. If you need more advice on convincing a spouse to save a marriage, most marriage counselors and professionally written self-help ebooks online can give you some tips.

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